After all, raising your pinky is often associated with elegance and good manners. But is that really true? Does sticking your pinky out while drinking wine actually make you look more refined? And what does modern etiquette say about it? Is it acceptable, or even recommended, to hold your wine glass with your pinky raised?

Let's take a closer look and find out whether this familiar gesture is genuinely a sign of elegance or simply a myth worth debunking. Read on for a few minutes, and you might be surprised by what you discover!

Why drinking with a raised pinky is thought to be elegant: the origin of this belief

Let's start with the origins of this belief, namely the almost automatic association between a raised pinky and an elegant or refined pose. Today, we almost take it for granted. But where does it come from? What is the origin of this widespread idea?

We admit, we did a lot of research because, initially, we didn't know the origins of the gesture. For the historical part, we consulted several English-language websites, especially the article The Origins of Raising Your Pinky When Drinking Tea, precisely because it is in this context, that of tea drinking, that this custom is thought to have originated.

While there are several hypotheses, one seems more plausible than any other. It's impossible to say for certain, but experts agree that the custom of holding the pinky up while drinking stems from practical needs related to tea consumption.

Let's put it in context: tea arrived in Europe from China around the 17th century. Initially, at least, it was a beverage almost entirely reserved for the wealthier classes, the only ones who could afford it. To drink it, people used small, handleless cups. Handled cups appeared at least a century later.

Tea was served very hot, so the lack of a handle made it difficult to hold the cup, increasing the risk of burning oneself. Thus, people began to grasp the cups by the top, using a maximum of three fingers: thumb, index finger, and sometimes middle finger. The ring and little fingers remained free, with the latter almost automatically raised to distance it from the heat source.

This is where the association of the raised little finger arose with the upper social classes, those who initially could afford to purchase tea, a true luxury good at the time. But even with the advent of teacups with handles, the custom persisted. The raised little finger continued to be used as a distinctive sign for the wealthy classes, becoming an expression of elegance and refinement, even imitated by those who aspired to reproduce the habits and customs of the aristocracy.

Over time, the gesture spread to the consumption of other beverages, including wine, eventually becoming widely associated with elegance and sophistication. It gradually lost its practical purpose and took on a purely symbolic meaning, becoming a sign of the elegance and refinement traditionally associated with the upper classes and nobility.

Is drinking wine with the pinky raised really elegant?

According to modern etiquette, drinking wine, and even tea, with the pinky raised is NOT a recognized sign of elegance. In short, it should be classified more among myths or popular beliefs than among the rules of etiquette.

In fact, nowadays, its most common interpretation is that of a gesture typical of someone who wants to show off refinement and elegance. It has acquired a negative connotation, like a caricature of someone who wants to appear refined, especially when the gesture is performed with great theatricality.

It should be noted that there is no specific rule of etiquette that prohibits it, but most modern guides advise against it both when drinking tea and when drinking wine. Let's not forget that contemporary rules favor a natural, composed, and measured grip, in keeping with an idea of refinement based on simplicity and sobriety.

Where and how should you hold your pinky when holding a wine glass?

We've already addressed this topic, at least in part, in the article How to properly hold a wine glass by the stem.

We said that the ideal way to hold the glass is by the stem, with the index and middle fingers on one side of the stem and the thumb on the other, with a relaxed hand.

And the pinky?

The pinky should remain naturally relaxed; it shouldn't be raised and shouldn't be involved in the grip. It can remain naturally extended, parallel to the stem, or, at most, rest lightly on the stem along with the ring finger, as long as the hand doesn't assume a rigid position.

The fundamental principle to respect is to maintain a spontaneous and natural grip. From this perspective, the pinky should not be intentionally raised in an attempt to display elegance.